Nothing To Loose.

I still remember it like it was yesturday.The way you stormed into my house and acted as if it was safe..You must have been watching my house for hours counting in my driveway..Moms gone, Dads gone, Brother and Sisters have left.You knew I was alone, you knew you could find a way inside.I remember humming to myself the tune to this romance.

I'd finally thought it was over.. between me and you.Actually there was NEVER a me and you..I told you that,Did you think i was kidding!?I thought i'd be afraid when i saw you standing there in the dark.You stared at me so longingly.. the fire in your sinful eyes flared.I could see you, eyeing me up and down.Why wasnt i afraid? When i knew you werent suppose to be there. I didnt scream when you pushed me against the wall.Flattening me with your body.Nor did i cry out when you held my wrists tightly above my head.The blow to my stomach didnt hurt half as bad as the kiss.There was no love in the way your lips touched mine. You wanted me that was all. Every piece of me you threatened with your dirty filthy hands.All i could think was please God not again!I tried my best to push you away to unlock your lips from mine...Why did you have to be so strong.

You laughed in my face when you felt my body trembling.I tried so hard not to cry.. to not show you how much you were hurting me.When i screamed out for help you laughed again..but when i cried out for **HIS** name.. you stopped.For only a moment but i felt your body freeze.I knew that you hated him.. knew you wanted to kill him.Well he wanted to kill you to.. for hurting me the way you were.If he only knew, knew how bad it was.If i could only tell him how often you had come... how much you had stolen from me. You screamed at me to tell you his name..I loved him. I wouldnt allow you to hurt him.

Did you think i was stupid!?HE had my heart what more could YOU take from me?You told me to forget him, said that i was YOURS alone.I glared at you, "NEVER!"So again you hit me.. this time hard across my face.I could feel the hand print and knew that it would bruise.It hurt so bad.. i couldnt hold in the tears. As i cried I fell to the floor and you allowed my body to fall..I knew it made you happy when i was down by your feet.

You thought that was where i belonged.For one second i thought i could do it...Thought that maybe if i pulled on your leg hard enough you would fall also.I tried my best but your weight and balance overpowered mine.You kicked me hard in the stomach it took all i had to hold the blood down from my mouth.

With one last kiss you kissed my cold lips, i fought you no more.As you left you screamed out to me, "If he loved you...where is your protector now?"And with that you left..thinking you took another piece of me with you.

Well you were wrong.Maybe he wasnt here to protect me...but i know he would NEVER hurt me.Maybe he wasnt the one who got to kiss meBut if he did... does it hurt to know i'd kiss HIM back? You are nothing. You are scum. Im afraid of you no longer. You've taken parts of me but this time its the end. You no longer hold my heart in your hands.